Well Hello 2019.

Ten thousand steps,
Dreams in her hand,
A winter’s tale.

We moved through time, the intensity of 365 days passed, in which I quit my job on 2 January 2018, moved to Paris in March, found another job in June, rented an apartment of my own in December, and broke free from influence. There is something about endings and saying goodbyes. The ache is real and strangely addictive. But that just makes new encounters all the more breathtaking. It makes you wonder, again and again, is life a giant ferris wheel? You go round and round, you go up and down, it all begins again. We move through time after time, wondering if we will see the ones we love again, when one ceases to exist. In the end, we remember moments of love, intense love. And how we fought to live on. 

Life is such.

It has been a year where I was under no pressure to be the greatest showman, or charming, or relatable. I decided I prefer myself this way, walking, encountering and writing away. Language is truly a powerful tool. I strongly recommend that you make learning a 3rd or 4th language one of your 2019 to-do-priorities.

Here are 5 things I would like to be able to execute in this new year.

  1. When they go low you go high. Says Michelle Obama. I say when people go low you don’t have to shake their hands, smile and say thank you, allowing the abuse to prevail. You are allowed to show your hurt, disengage and delete them from your life. 
  2. Speak up, speak out, speak proud.
  3. Brace up and be a woman. Don’t allow myself to be bullied by service staff. Or anyone, really.
  4. Make every fall I’ve ever taken be worth the pain. “I’m not telling you it’s going to be easy. I’m telling you it’s going to be worth it.” This is for anyone who is waiting for a time to shine in your life, the time is #NOW
  5. Lastly, don’t look back, you are not going that way. 

“When the time comes, take all your glory, and stand aside”– so aptly put by Erich Kastner. So here I go, I am going to show you how I gladiate. And then out and up I return when death beckons, which could be anytime, soon. We’ll never know when. I wish for you courage and the capacity to embrace the potential of each ephemeral lifetime. And while chasing your next big goal, don’t forget about the million little moments that make the chase worthwhile. 

Après avoir vu la descente, contemple l’ascension.
You have seen me fall, now watch me fly.

An Ordinary Woman In Paris.

It’s been a little more than two weeks since I moved to Paris. When flight SQ334 landed on the morning of 19th March, I marvelled at the snow that greeted me, even when Spring was just round the corner. I thought to myself as the plane touched down the runway, that the world was ending, there was no time to waste.

Savour life, I say, and make things happen for yourself. The watchword being: self-imagination. Or else your story will end up like one of those indie films, where pretty much nothing really happens, and the characters grow old and die. Not sad, but not exciting either. I realized we’ve got to foster our dreams, the way we nurture relationships with the people we care for. And this balance between life’s practicalities and hopes constantly kept me on my toes. I am in Paris, because I do not want to surrender to the limitations of where I came from. I expected more out of a lifetime, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with harbouring a desire for a bigger, better, brighter you. No matter what they say.

And so here I am, dancing and drowning in spontaneity.

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For now, before my next adventure begins. I am in no hurry. Can we stay this way for a lifetime? I believe, that when a woman sheds her armour of self-importance, she becomes stronger. You can no longer hurt her with your cynicism. “Today’s news is tomorrow’s history”. I no longer take what is said about me, about anything or anyone seriously. Being Sharon Au suddenly seems pretty fun and distinctive again without all these self-image baggages. You will not hurt me with your words. Not for too long anyway.

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If an ordinary girl from Singapore who grew up from a broken, poor and unprivileged family background could receive a good education, be awarded Best Trainee of Singapore Airlines Batch 364, win 11 Star Awards trophies as a TV host and actress, study abroad in Japan and France in my 30s, contribute to the media and fashion industry after graduation and arrive in Paris, I believe nothing should ever stop you from stepping out and stepping up. Live with vigour!

This is not the end. I want to see you fly.

(Photos by Yujia)

About Time.


It’s been exactly a month since I arrived in Paris. The initial overwhelming tirade of excitement has subsided, and I am left with a nagging sense of habitude, and hence, tranquility.

On my way to Monoprix, my thoughts were startled by a cheerful “Bonjour Sharon!” and I saw Vincent, hands full of groceries, beaming at me. Vincent runs a café which I frequent every morning, just because he makes the best Sharon’s café in the world, 3 shots of espresso, a dollop of crème, and a dash of familiarity.


This is the quality of life I seeked, where you settle into a healthy routine, sans drama. Where you make friends with the boulangere, with the restaurant owner, and maybe your neighbour’s cat. You no longer rush to shop and to visit the crowded places-of-interest, but take your own sweet time to picnic at little charming gardens you chanced upon along the way. Nobody here knows me. I can do whatever I want. I can be comfortable with myself, my plain old unglamorous funny self.


I am alive again.

Sometimes, not saying anything at all says everything. I found the strength in keeping quiet at last. I am good to let things end.

Because Alexander Venheijer said, “when a flower doesn’t bloom, you fix the environment in which it grows, not the flower”. So with the same courage I took to leave show business in 2005, I bid farewell again to a toxic relationship with a city, and packed my wounded heart, and my two luggages, for the second time.


It’s about time. It was good and I lived it.

Now, your turn.

Bonjour Paris. 


I wake up in peace.

Strange thing to say I know, but alas, there are stranger things. I wake up to the silence of a Parisian morning in my petite apartment. I listen intently to the thoughts running through my mind. And I find none. I dived deeper in my consciousness into the subconscious. I start to recall last night’s dream in montage. There were scenes of farewells, and tears, and maybe anger. I dreamt they shut down my website, they removed my TVCs, they shut me up, they make me small.

And now I am awake, and it does not matter anymore. Dream or no dream. I am safe. I am big. I am unstoppable.

I need nothing. My new life begins.

Si vous aimez la pluie autant que moi

Comme une danse. Dans une ville où j’attends revenir.

You can tell by now, that I obviously miss Paris a lot. 

You like to ask me how am I coping so far, after-all a year has already gone by and I should have settled into an old familiar rhythm by now.

Isn’t it? 

No. Not really. 

My heart aches for Tokyo. It is often too painful to talk about Tokyo. And that is why I prefer to sing about Paris. Then I don’t spiral into the abyss of melancholic yearning.

Paris is a love story, a romantic-comedy.

Tokyo on the other hand,  is a good old Kurosawa film noir. .

Never let me go. 

Where I used to wake up, grab a melon-bun and a cuppa coffee and ran to class every morning.

Where I got lost in my thoughts on the streets of Takadanobaba trying not to bump into fellow cyclists or worse, old ladies with bags of groceries. 

Where I was small but I occupied the city with a soul that soared, wholehearted I loved and I breathed.

When I close my eyes in bed every single night, I think about my Tokyo this way, while I bid goodnight to this almost-perfect life here in Singapore. 

I miss not knowing what is going to happen next.

I miss the walks in the park in the crowded streets of Shibuya in the quiet back streets of Jiyugaoka. 

I miss being vulnerable.

I miss me, when I was in another city.